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Princess Amy – NOT!

When I got married years ago, I was under the impression that it was up to my husband to meet my needs and anticipate what I wanted (and give it to me).
Princess anyone?
I didn’t realize it at the time, but I saw myself as a piece of property. Like a nice watch or a set of golf clubs. I had been “passed” to my husband from my father.
There are so many problems with this way of thinking… But the way it showed up for me was seething, festering, toxic RESENTMENT.
Because my husband is not magic. He can’t read my mind, nor should he have to.
Yet for years I was so angry at him because he just wasn’t able to make me happy in the way I thought he should.
And believe me, that poor man tried.
It wasn’t until I nearly destroyed the marriage that I finally realized:
IT WASN’T HIS RESPONSIBILITY TO MAKE ME HAPPY.
I had to figure out how to do that myself and Get. 👏 Started. 👏
27 years later that one insight changed our relationship forever.
That’s the thing my friend, taking responsibility for what you want is anything but selfish. It’s the opposite. Because not taking responsibility means one thing: you expect everybody else to know what you need.
WHICH IS IMPOSSIBLE. (And when they don’t do the IMPOSSIBLE you feel resentment.)
Here’s the fix:
Stop bending over backwards to meet everybody else’s needs, expecting them to do the same for you — figure out how you like your own damn eggs.
I’m hosting “The Dream BIG 5 Day Challenge: Identify It. Own It. Do It.”
It’s from August 31st through September 4th.
15 minutes a day to…
💥 Finally get to the bottom of why you keep stopping yourself from dreaming
💥 Overcome inner and outer obstacles to getting what you want
💥 Learn how to achieve what you want faster than you could ever have imagined
💥 Gain a lifelong community of cheerleaders who want to see you succeed
💥 Eliminate toxic behaviors that keep you from your dreams (like resentment)
💥 Unapologetically identify and claim what you really want without needing permission or validation from anyone else
Life is sooooo much better when you’re not pissed off all the time!
And yes, there WILL be prizes.

What they don’t tell you at spin class

I remember the first ever time I walked into a Burn Cycle class. My friend invited me to go with her… “First time?” She asked. “Yes…” I replied. That’s when she raised her eyebrows and gave me an ominous look that said sarcastically, “good luck.” Just getting on the... read more

For better or for worse

This morning my daughter went MIA before school. We only had 10 minutes left before it was time to leave for the bus and she still hadn’t finished her homework, eaten any breakfast, brushed her teeth or put on her shoes. I found her outside barefoot with some neighbor... read more

Who are you surrounded by?

I was born into a chaotic household. My parents were addicts. My three older sisters were teenagers, barely supervised, who were expected to take care of me and eventually my little brother who was born a few years later. My mom called herself a functional drunk. She... read more

27 Ways to Turn Anxiety into a Superpower

The other day I made tentative plans with a friend to do something over the weekend. The day before, I realized I had to do some “momming” (this is my new word for running around like a decapitated chicken trying to get kids places on time), so I texted her to cancel.... read more